Chickens.
And rabbits. Specifically a French Angora.
Herb plants in the kitchen.
Vegetables in the garden.
Little ones under foot.
Being country must be a genetic trait. It pops up in the strangest places.
Showing posts with label dream. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dream. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Friday, December 5, 2008
Dream Log
Okay, general outline of last nights dream (no weight).
Oh, also, somewhere in all that I ended up in a car wreck because someone switched the gas and brake pedal in my car. Instead of slowing down when I came upon the traffic jam I just plowed right threw. It killed one woman and wounded two disabled children. I then had a conversation with my actual mother about whether or not she had been awake when the wreck happened and had just appeared in the dream when she fell asleep. She seemed to think I'd actually killed the woman and should be expecting to receive a traffic ticket.
Morning!
- My husband, sister and I were adopted by the Cullens (the vampire 'parents' in Twilight).
- My sister and I found a magical cupboard that would duplicate any non-living thing you put in it over night. We used it to get more craft materials (mostly yarn).
- My sister adopted a two foot long baby alligator that tried to eat her arm. She wouldn't give it up, though.
- The Cullens adopted more kids until we totalled something like twenty all together.
- Divisions began to develop in the family, my husband and I decided it was time for people to split up and move into different houses. In our thinking, it was better to live separately but still be on good terms with everyone than try continuing to live together and have hate spring up between us.
- We proposed two additional houses to our siblings (for three total, including the original house) and our siblings seemed generally agreeable.
- When we brought it up with Mr. and Mrs. Cullen no one would decide who went where. I remember someone saying that there was no way my husband and I would leave the original house. I was kind of surprised, considering this had been our idea in the first place.
- We announced that we were leaving, much to the shock of the eighteen other people, and, in the end, two or three people ended up coming with us.
- We said goodbye to our 'parents' and left.
Oh, also, somewhere in all that I ended up in a car wreck because someone switched the gas and brake pedal in my car. Instead of slowing down when I came upon the traffic jam I just plowed right threw. It killed one woman and wounded two disabled children. I then had a conversation with my actual mother about whether or not she had been awake when the wreck happened and had just appeared in the dream when she fell asleep. She seemed to think I'd actually killed the woman and should be expecting to receive a traffic ticket.
Morning!
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Dream Log
I was too stressed to sense if it was important.
There were quiet a few mini-dreams before this one; however, I don't remember any of them. There were also a few dreams afterward as well but I don't remember them either.
I'm not going to go into a whole lot of detail. I really debated even typing this up. I get anxious just thinking about it.
There was my husband, my siblings, my mother and myself. I don't know where my dad was. Probably off on work. We started out in the middle of nowhere in the west with lots of trees and lush grasses and a bunch of animals. The wind was unbelievable. The birds were all waddling around with their wings closed and their bodies tight to the ground. I picked one up and it freaked out so it's wings opened a little. The wind practically snatched the poor thing out of my hands and would have whisked it off to who knows where.
Somehow, there was a huge flat panel TV hooked up to a cliff face for us to watch. Someone had invaded the US and had taken over Washington and multiple other major cities. There was constant footage from the view of a hand held camera of various people getting killed. My family held a little meeting on what to do. There was no where in the US to go, all the cities either had been taken or were, in a very short period of time, going to be taken. So we decided to do what just about every American says they're going to do but never does when they don't like what is happening in the US: we went to Canada. Or, rather, we tried to get to Canada.
There was some concern over how far we would have to walk through uninhabited areas and we had no provisions and one set of clothes. Someone suggest stopping by an old military base near by and, if it was indeed abandoned, taking some stuff from there. We were split in opinion but the majority wanted to try. So we hiked through more trees and lush grasses with animals moving in droves everywhere. There was a door in the rock we took to get into the base. We climbed up flights of broken stairs through darkness and sometimes had to climb around great holes in the stair by grabbing the various piping.
Inside we found Sam, the brother of a friend of mine. He had gotten separated from his family and found his way here. He decided to come with us. My husband, brothers and Sam all made their way ahead of me while my mother and sister followed way behind. Suddenly, I walked through a door and found myself facing a group of military men all laying around on the stairs and piping. They didn't move and I wondered if they were dead but when I said hello their eyes moved toward me. I asked if the base was inhabited, they didn't answer. I told them Washington had been taken, they said they already knew. A man dressed all in black began to quickly make his way from where ever he had been toward me. I told them we were heading to Canada. They all sat up with fear in their eyes, "NO!" they cried, "Do you truly wish to be dead!?"
From above I heard a door scape open and a coarse voice cry out a halt. The men around me froze in fear. Some more shouting, my husband yelled, "Sam! NO! No, Sam! Don't Friar!" I knew in my heart Sam was being killed and my family would follow. I thought of my brothers all caught at the door with no escape, of my mother and sister so far behind and all the men around me whose hiding place had been exposed. Feet began to descend from above and I looked below me. I hung from a pipe over a great hole in the stair and could see all the way down to the place we had come in, hundreds of feet below me. I let my hands slip. I did not wish to die. But dying from a fall was a better fate than watching my family be murdered. We had no escape and I knew it.
Just before I hit the ground, I remembered reading that people were unsure if you died in a dream if you might actually die in real life. I woke as I felt my feet strike the floor. I couldn't breath, my arms were numb and wouldn't move, my legs felt like they had been set on fire. When I finally did regain control over myself, I stumbled to the bathroom and found I was gasping for air and shaking terribly. When I came back to bed I didn't want to fall back asleep but I was so completely exhausted that sleep eventually came.
There were quiet a few mini-dreams before this one; however, I don't remember any of them. There were also a few dreams afterward as well but I don't remember them either.
I'm not going to go into a whole lot of detail. I really debated even typing this up. I get anxious just thinking about it.
There was my husband, my siblings, my mother and myself. I don't know where my dad was. Probably off on work. We started out in the middle of nowhere in the west with lots of trees and lush grasses and a bunch of animals. The wind was unbelievable. The birds were all waddling around with their wings closed and their bodies tight to the ground. I picked one up and it freaked out so it's wings opened a little. The wind practically snatched the poor thing out of my hands and would have whisked it off to who knows where.
Somehow, there was a huge flat panel TV hooked up to a cliff face for us to watch. Someone had invaded the US and had taken over Washington and multiple other major cities. There was constant footage from the view of a hand held camera of various people getting killed. My family held a little meeting on what to do. There was no where in the US to go, all the cities either had been taken or were, in a very short period of time, going to be taken. So we decided to do what just about every American says they're going to do but never does when they don't like what is happening in the US: we went to Canada. Or, rather, we tried to get to Canada.
There was some concern over how far we would have to walk through uninhabited areas and we had no provisions and one set of clothes. Someone suggest stopping by an old military base near by and, if it was indeed abandoned, taking some stuff from there. We were split in opinion but the majority wanted to try. So we hiked through more trees and lush grasses with animals moving in droves everywhere. There was a door in the rock we took to get into the base. We climbed up flights of broken stairs through darkness and sometimes had to climb around great holes in the stair by grabbing the various piping.
Inside we found Sam, the brother of a friend of mine. He had gotten separated from his family and found his way here. He decided to come with us. My husband, brothers and Sam all made their way ahead of me while my mother and sister followed way behind. Suddenly, I walked through a door and found myself facing a group of military men all laying around on the stairs and piping. They didn't move and I wondered if they were dead but when I said hello their eyes moved toward me. I asked if the base was inhabited, they didn't answer. I told them Washington had been taken, they said they already knew. A man dressed all in black began to quickly make his way from where ever he had been toward me. I told them we were heading to Canada. They all sat up with fear in their eyes, "NO!" they cried, "Do you truly wish to be dead!?"
From above I heard a door scape open and a coarse voice cry out a halt. The men around me froze in fear. Some more shouting, my husband yelled, "Sam! NO! No, Sam! Don't Friar!" I knew in my heart Sam was being killed and my family would follow. I thought of my brothers all caught at the door with no escape, of my mother and sister so far behind and all the men around me whose hiding place had been exposed. Feet began to descend from above and I looked below me. I hung from a pipe over a great hole in the stair and could see all the way down to the place we had come in, hundreds of feet below me. I let my hands slip. I did not wish to die. But dying from a fall was a better fate than watching my family be murdered. We had no escape and I knew it.
Just before I hit the ground, I remembered reading that people were unsure if you died in a dream if you might actually die in real life. I woke as I felt my feet strike the floor. I couldn't breath, my arms were numb and wouldn't move, my legs felt like they had been set on fire. When I finally did regain control over myself, I stumbled to the bathroom and found I was gasping for air and shaking terribly. When I came back to bed I didn't want to fall back asleep but I was so completely exhausted that sleep eventually came.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Dream Log
No weight, just weird.
My dad and I were driving along a country road and I was looking up stuff on my laptop (on the Internet, don't ask me how I had access on a country road). I was at a site that looked much like Hulu.com and found some episodes of the evening news (because in dream land they decided the news wasn't exciting enough and turned it into an action adventure series). They had some mini-commercials comparing two of the actresses and I clicked on one labeled Needs to Learn. Apparently it was universally agreed that the in station news anchor wasn't nearly as cool as the ground woman who, in this TV Action series, in addition to giving the news also helped solve the mysteries. Woohoo. So I clicked on Solving a Problem and watched a short clip of an episode.
The ground woman stepped out of a military jet with a clip board and began interrogating people. She stopped by an army medic who was looking at a dead soldier and quizzed him for details. He was indeed dead, the medic rambled off a bunch of stuff I didn't understand, and then, poisoned. The woman looked concerned and asked if all of them were the same. The man nodded. Her eyes grew wide and said something to the extent of, "How can this be?" as the camera pulled back and showed that they were standing in the middle of a field covered in the bodies of dead soldiers who looked as though they had simply fallen asleep.
I was unsurprised when I looked up from my laptop to find my dad and I were driving right by that particular field and could see the jet and the mounds of bodies. We also saw thousands of people dressed in stereotypical 'savage' type clothing and carrying spears come running towards the jet. Above them was a large grey cloud and behind it was a light that reminded me of when you close your eyes for a really long time and then open them, there's a bunch of little white 'explosions', except these explosions were black. My dad asked me if I though the jet would escape and I said I did, it was mostly air tight so if the cloud had poisoned the soldiers they should be fine and I was pretty sure the last bit of the episode had shown everyone standing in surprise and then running into the jet. Dad pointed out that we might want to pick up our pace a bit, just in case the hoard of people saw us and changed targets. I was all for that.
Then I was with Dustin and he was driving an abandoned school bus. He swerved around children who were trying to poke our wheels with spears. It's strange, trying to live and not kill your enemy at the same time. Some how, seven or so of the children became normal? were normal? I don't remember. They were normal children of the crazy people so we picked them up and headed toward the nearest city (we figured there would be enough people there that could defend themselves, provided we all didn't get poisoned). I began talking with them and asked how this had come about. They didn't know. One minute their families were fine, the next they were donning animal skins and fashioning spears. There were no histories of mental illness, their families were well educated, no they didn't want to go back, their families would just spear them. They didn't really think we would live either but were willing to give it a shot. Another reporter knocked on the bus door and Dustin let her in. She asked if he wanted to stay somewhere safe and he said no, he didn't think the spearmen would be able to take Hilliard. She nodded and then came back to speak with one of the children. That's when I noticed that six of them were under the age of seven, the seventh was at least fifteen, I wondered why that might be but never found out. I encouraged the reporter to interview the children, they were the only 'inside' information we had. She agreed to do so.
I woke up and wondered what was going to happen, I wandered to the bathroom pondering the cloud and the black explosions. When I came back to bed, Dustin lifted up the covers for me. As I climbed in I asked, "Where's Hilliard."
"Um, west."
"Oh, okay." I had been pretty sure it was an actual place.
My dad and I were driving along a country road and I was looking up stuff on my laptop (on the Internet, don't ask me how I had access on a country road). I was at a site that looked much like Hulu.com and found some episodes of the evening news (because in dream land they decided the news wasn't exciting enough and turned it into an action adventure series). They had some mini-commercials comparing two of the actresses and I clicked on one labeled Needs to Learn. Apparently it was universally agreed that the in station news anchor wasn't nearly as cool as the ground woman who, in this TV Action series, in addition to giving the news also helped solve the mysteries. Woohoo. So I clicked on Solving a Problem and watched a short clip of an episode.
The ground woman stepped out of a military jet with a clip board and began interrogating people. She stopped by an army medic who was looking at a dead soldier and quizzed him for details. He was indeed dead, the medic rambled off a bunch of stuff I didn't understand, and then, poisoned. The woman looked concerned and asked if all of them were the same. The man nodded. Her eyes grew wide and said something to the extent of, "How can this be?" as the camera pulled back and showed that they were standing in the middle of a field covered in the bodies of dead soldiers who looked as though they had simply fallen asleep.
I was unsurprised when I looked up from my laptop to find my dad and I were driving right by that particular field and could see the jet and the mounds of bodies. We also saw thousands of people dressed in stereotypical 'savage' type clothing and carrying spears come running towards the jet. Above them was a large grey cloud and behind it was a light that reminded me of when you close your eyes for a really long time and then open them, there's a bunch of little white 'explosions', except these explosions were black. My dad asked me if I though the jet would escape and I said I did, it was mostly air tight so if the cloud had poisoned the soldiers they should be fine and I was pretty sure the last bit of the episode had shown everyone standing in surprise and then running into the jet. Dad pointed out that we might want to pick up our pace a bit, just in case the hoard of people saw us and changed targets. I was all for that.
Then I was with Dustin and he was driving an abandoned school bus. He swerved around children who were trying to poke our wheels with spears. It's strange, trying to live and not kill your enemy at the same time. Some how, seven or so of the children became normal? were normal? I don't remember. They were normal children of the crazy people so we picked them up and headed toward the nearest city (we figured there would be enough people there that could defend themselves, provided we all didn't get poisoned). I began talking with them and asked how this had come about. They didn't know. One minute their families were fine, the next they were donning animal skins and fashioning spears. There were no histories of mental illness, their families were well educated, no they didn't want to go back, their families would just spear them. They didn't really think we would live either but were willing to give it a shot. Another reporter knocked on the bus door and Dustin let her in. She asked if he wanted to stay somewhere safe and he said no, he didn't think the spearmen would be able to take Hilliard. She nodded and then came back to speak with one of the children. That's when I noticed that six of them were under the age of seven, the seventh was at least fifteen, I wondered why that might be but never found out. I encouraged the reporter to interview the children, they were the only 'inside' information we had. She agreed to do so.
I woke up and wondered what was going to happen, I wandered to the bathroom pondering the cloud and the black explosions. When I came back to bed, Dustin lifted up the covers for me. As I climbed in I asked, "Where's Hilliard."
"Um, west."
"Oh, okay." I had been pretty sure it was an actual place.
Friday, November 7, 2008
Snippets
For those who wonder what happened to the lengthy dreams, I'm still dreaming. However, they are in short snippets and shift often to other unrelated snippets and are harder to remember and, quite frankly, not that interesting.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Dream Log
This dream was about children. Lots and lots of children. No weight.
I don't remember it very vividly but my first memory is a big gathering of people. A lot of people I didn't know, but a few that I did, and some people that I knew very well in the dream but now that I'm awake I can't place for the life of me.
We were all playing a card game. Bob Wickham (sp) was there with his western neck tie and Yanna (Sp), both from my old church. Yanna kept trying to sit with her mother but her mother kept moving chairs or disappearing all together. I went back and forth between the game and watching the children. A little boy named Oliver found a way to light fire so I taught him how to stomp it out while it was still small. And there was a woman, a dear friend, who I don't know. It's very frustrating because I know I know her, but I can't find her anywhere in my head. She was very pregnant, eight or nine months.
The next bit is very blurry, I remember trick-or-treating, I remember an African American woman with her very small son. There was a man with them, her brother or husband, I never found out. They had died but were happy because they continued to live without the poverty and fear they had had before. She never said but I got the impression they had lived somewhere inner city. Her son was very sweet, he shook my hand and smiled, which was strange because he was not even a year old.
I got in a car with my mother, I think. And someone else was in a car following me. I think we were friends, I think we were traveling together, I'm not sure. I forget how it happened but we got into an accident. Nothing big, just bumped bumpers, but we were all pulled over anyway. The police man wasn't very nice or thorough. He never asked me what happened (not that I could have told him anyway), he just asked me for a bunch of papers and then told me to get out of the car and lay on the ground with my coat and keys. He did the same to the other car and soon, my dear friend's husband was lying next to me. I asked how everyone in his car was, he said he wasn't sure. He was very quiet. A woman came over and sat with us and asked how many were in the accident. I said we weren't sure (maybe there was a third car, I don't remember), but at least four and a half. She laughed and asked how we could have half a person. My friend finally got out of the car, yelling at the police man (which was very out of her character) and walked into the hospital we happened to be in the parking lot of.
I was suddenly very worried and very afraid. I didn't know how it had happened, but I was fairly sure I had caused the accident. The woman said she understood the half now. I started to cry. I told the woman that I really hoped nothing had happened to the baby. My friend desperately wanted a child and she'd already had three miscarriages. Her husband remained silent. If this one died, it would be my fault.
Dustin called me. I woke up crying.
I don't remember it very vividly but my first memory is a big gathering of people. A lot of people I didn't know, but a few that I did, and some people that I knew very well in the dream but now that I'm awake I can't place for the life of me.
We were all playing a card game. Bob Wickham (sp) was there with his western neck tie and Yanna (Sp), both from my old church. Yanna kept trying to sit with her mother but her mother kept moving chairs or disappearing all together. I went back and forth between the game and watching the children. A little boy named Oliver found a way to light fire so I taught him how to stomp it out while it was still small. And there was a woman, a dear friend, who I don't know. It's very frustrating because I know I know her, but I can't find her anywhere in my head. She was very pregnant, eight or nine months.
The next bit is very blurry, I remember trick-or-treating, I remember an African American woman with her very small son. There was a man with them, her brother or husband, I never found out. They had died but were happy because they continued to live without the poverty and fear they had had before. She never said but I got the impression they had lived somewhere inner city. Her son was very sweet, he shook my hand and smiled, which was strange because he was not even a year old.
I got in a car with my mother, I think. And someone else was in a car following me. I think we were friends, I think we were traveling together, I'm not sure. I forget how it happened but we got into an accident. Nothing big, just bumped bumpers, but we were all pulled over anyway. The police man wasn't very nice or thorough. He never asked me what happened (not that I could have told him anyway), he just asked me for a bunch of papers and then told me to get out of the car and lay on the ground with my coat and keys. He did the same to the other car and soon, my dear friend's husband was lying next to me. I asked how everyone in his car was, he said he wasn't sure. He was very quiet. A woman came over and sat with us and asked how many were in the accident. I said we weren't sure (maybe there was a third car, I don't remember), but at least four and a half. She laughed and asked how we could have half a person. My friend finally got out of the car, yelling at the police man (which was very out of her character) and walked into the hospital we happened to be in the parking lot of.
I was suddenly very worried and very afraid. I didn't know how it had happened, but I was fairly sure I had caused the accident. The woman said she understood the half now. I started to cry. I told the woman that I really hoped nothing had happened to the baby. My friend desperately wanted a child and she'd already had three miscarriages. Her husband remained silent. If this one died, it would be my fault.
Dustin called me. I woke up crying.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Dream Log
Hm... maybe I should start naming these dreams. But they don't really feel like they're named. Oh, well. I should also probably starting marking the ones that have 'the weight', that 'this is important' feeling, just so I don't get confused later. Hm...
Alright, then, this is 'I promised him I'd pay more for you' and it didn't have 'the weight'.
My husband and I were on some sort of vacation with my parents. It was 'some sort' because it felt like we were there for my dad's business but the accommodations were amazing. It was an absolutely beautiful five star hotel, complete with huge bathroom. Also, Dustin and I kept hopping back and forth between 'married' and 'not yet married', which was weird. Apparently one of the guests took an interest in me and decided he was going to marry me instead. Sorry, I have no idea what his name was, it never came up, so he's just 'this guy'. He was very suave and had dark hair and was slender... just picture a millionaire's spoiled brat and you've got him.
I went to the restroom for a few minutes and pondered with pity how much work it must be for the poor housekeeper who had to clean it everyday. A brief intermission. When I returned to our room Dustin asked me about this guy who had decided he was going to married me. I told him this guy had been following me around but I wasn't at all interested in him. Dustin gave me a very weighing look, not a 'I'm weighing you' look but a 'I'm thinking very hard and you help me focus' look. "Good," he said, "Because I told him I would pay more for you."
In the dream, Dustin had bought me from my father, in our married/not yet married state. I don't know the exact amount of money that had been agreed upon but it was something with six or more digits. It hadn't been paid yet because Dustin would't have the money until he'd worked for a few years, so until the amount was paid I wasn't officially his. So, this guy walks in, finds out I'm not paid for and then threatens my... betrothed, I suppose. I never did find out exactly what was said but I was under the impression that life was threatened and some how Dustin managed to be willing to pay more for me. This guy had left Dustin with the understanding that he would be hanging around to 1) make it really difficult for him to make enough money and 2) take me when Dustin couldn't pay up.
We ran. I don't know whose car we took but it wasn't ours. Ours doesn't go that fast. But this guy followed us, needless to say, the millionaire's kid's car went really, really fast. We decided we couldn't out run him so we turned around and went to this guy's school. He attended this massive, gilded university. Apparently, we attended, too, because we knew the layout of the student housing and some students recognized me. I left Dustin, two of my brothers, and my sister at which ever house this guy lived in. I wasn't sure what they were doing, I was slightly afraid they were going to kill his car but I didn't say anything. I wasn't interested in marrying him so whatever they did, so long as it worked, was fine by me. My job was to be a decoy.
So I wandered down the street looking sweetly around, trying my best to act exactly how I would have acted back in the room full of my father's highly paid clients. This guy found me wandering around and acts all sweet and suave. I tell him I'm lost, it's such a big place, and I'm trying to find a certain building on campus but I can't seem to find my way through student housing to campus. He smiled and said he'd be happy to walk me but first he needed to stop by his house, I some how convinced him I was really late so he reluctantly agreed to walk me to class first. I don't really know what we talked about on our walk to campus. It was mostly me being in awe of him, the campus, the houses, whatever. I was pretending to be from some small country town. Smiling and sweet, and hoping my husband wasn't going to get himself killed.
We kept seeing electric company signs through out the neighborhood, I knew that Dustin and my siblings were pretending to be workers so no one would question why they were running all over this guy's house. This guy seemed really confused by them and slightly suspicious, but I kept being sweet so he kept walking me along. We finally ended up at the building I 'needed' and this guy just walks in and sits down in the middle of a history lecture. No one chided him for his very rude behavior and I noticed some fearful looks in his direction. He motioned for me to sit down and I smiled and whispered, "But, I'm late for art."
I went outside and looked at the landscape. To my left stood the campus. The entire thing was made of white marble. It was beautiful and awe inspiring. To my right was hill country. Green with trees swaying. It was beautiful and peaceful. The class must have ended because this guy came out and stood by me. I made some comment about the city being amazing, but it didn't look the same with him standing there. It was dreary. Then I pointed to the hill country, which had some how become desolate in just the moment I had looked away. I told him where I was from was more like the hill country and that the city was so strange to me.
We walked toward campus, I still had 'art'. He suddenly started to walk the other way and I knew he was going back to his house. I pouted and suddenly I was warding of this guy who had interpreted my pout as an invitation. I laughed and explained that country folk didn't do that. That I didn't kiss random people. He looked confused and then asked if I was interested in men. I think I responded with, "I'm a woman. But I don't just do that." And wondered why on earth not kissing men left and right was equated with being lesbian. He didn't seem satisfied and I was beginning to wonder how much longer I could distract him without getting into serious trouble.
Dustin appeared beside me, kind of. This guy and I were standing on the sidewalk and Dustin was in the street, there was some kind of rail in between. I had my back to it and Dustin was leaning his stomach against it from the other side. Dustin told this guy that he had fixed this guy's electronics, that was a some odd dollar amount job, and this guy no longer had any claim on me. I wasn't sure if revealing that I had been tricking this guy would be the best thing at the moment so I continued being sweet and smiley. They argued back and forth, this guy never letting go of my tightly held wrist. I kept leaning back on the railing, wishing I could just slip through the bars to Dustin, but I wasn't sure if this guy would let me go, even if I made it through. They kept arguing, I kept pushing. I closed my eyes and then opened them to look at the ceiling.
I heard Dustin breathing next to me and smiled. I'd made it through. Dustin had won.
Alright, then, this is 'I promised him I'd pay more for you' and it didn't have 'the weight'.
My husband and I were on some sort of vacation with my parents. It was 'some sort' because it felt like we were there for my dad's business but the accommodations were amazing. It was an absolutely beautiful five star hotel, complete with huge bathroom. Also, Dustin and I kept hopping back and forth between 'married' and 'not yet married', which was weird. Apparently one of the guests took an interest in me and decided he was going to marry me instead. Sorry, I have no idea what his name was, it never came up, so he's just 'this guy'. He was very suave and had dark hair and was slender... just picture a millionaire's spoiled brat and you've got him.
I went to the restroom for a few minutes and pondered with pity how much work it must be for the poor housekeeper who had to clean it everyday. A brief intermission. When I returned to our room Dustin asked me about this guy who had decided he was going to married me. I told him this guy had been following me around but I wasn't at all interested in him. Dustin gave me a very weighing look, not a 'I'm weighing you' look but a 'I'm thinking very hard and you help me focus' look. "Good," he said, "Because I told him I would pay more for you."
In the dream, Dustin had bought me from my father, in our married/not yet married state. I don't know the exact amount of money that had been agreed upon but it was something with six or more digits. It hadn't been paid yet because Dustin would't have the money until he'd worked for a few years, so until the amount was paid I wasn't officially his. So, this guy walks in, finds out I'm not paid for and then threatens my... betrothed, I suppose. I never did find out exactly what was said but I was under the impression that life was threatened and some how Dustin managed to be willing to pay more for me. This guy had left Dustin with the understanding that he would be hanging around to 1) make it really difficult for him to make enough money and 2) take me when Dustin couldn't pay up.
We ran. I don't know whose car we took but it wasn't ours. Ours doesn't go that fast. But this guy followed us, needless to say, the millionaire's kid's car went really, really fast. We decided we couldn't out run him so we turned around and went to this guy's school. He attended this massive, gilded university. Apparently, we attended, too, because we knew the layout of the student housing and some students recognized me. I left Dustin, two of my brothers, and my sister at which ever house this guy lived in. I wasn't sure what they were doing, I was slightly afraid they were going to kill his car but I didn't say anything. I wasn't interested in marrying him so whatever they did, so long as it worked, was fine by me. My job was to be a decoy.
So I wandered down the street looking sweetly around, trying my best to act exactly how I would have acted back in the room full of my father's highly paid clients. This guy found me wandering around and acts all sweet and suave. I tell him I'm lost, it's such a big place, and I'm trying to find a certain building on campus but I can't seem to find my way through student housing to campus. He smiled and said he'd be happy to walk me but first he needed to stop by his house, I some how convinced him I was really late so he reluctantly agreed to walk me to class first. I don't really know what we talked about on our walk to campus. It was mostly me being in awe of him, the campus, the houses, whatever. I was pretending to be from some small country town. Smiling and sweet, and hoping my husband wasn't going to get himself killed.
We kept seeing electric company signs through out the neighborhood, I knew that Dustin and my siblings were pretending to be workers so no one would question why they were running all over this guy's house. This guy seemed really confused by them and slightly suspicious, but I kept being sweet so he kept walking me along. We finally ended up at the building I 'needed' and this guy just walks in and sits down in the middle of a history lecture. No one chided him for his very rude behavior and I noticed some fearful looks in his direction. He motioned for me to sit down and I smiled and whispered, "But, I'm late for art."
I went outside and looked at the landscape. To my left stood the campus. The entire thing was made of white marble. It was beautiful and awe inspiring. To my right was hill country. Green with trees swaying. It was beautiful and peaceful. The class must have ended because this guy came out and stood by me. I made some comment about the city being amazing, but it didn't look the same with him standing there. It was dreary. Then I pointed to the hill country, which had some how become desolate in just the moment I had looked away. I told him where I was from was more like the hill country and that the city was so strange to me.
We walked toward campus, I still had 'art'. He suddenly started to walk the other way and I knew he was going back to his house. I pouted and suddenly I was warding of this guy who had interpreted my pout as an invitation. I laughed and explained that country folk didn't do that. That I didn't kiss random people. He looked confused and then asked if I was interested in men. I think I responded with, "I'm a woman. But I don't just do that." And wondered why on earth not kissing men left and right was equated with being lesbian. He didn't seem satisfied and I was beginning to wonder how much longer I could distract him without getting into serious trouble.
Dustin appeared beside me, kind of. This guy and I were standing on the sidewalk and Dustin was in the street, there was some kind of rail in between. I had my back to it and Dustin was leaning his stomach against it from the other side. Dustin told this guy that he had fixed this guy's electronics, that was a some odd dollar amount job, and this guy no longer had any claim on me. I wasn't sure if revealing that I had been tricking this guy would be the best thing at the moment so I continued being sweet and smiley. They argued back and forth, this guy never letting go of my tightly held wrist. I kept leaning back on the railing, wishing I could just slip through the bars to Dustin, but I wasn't sure if this guy would let me go, even if I made it through. They kept arguing, I kept pushing. I closed my eyes and then opened them to look at the ceiling.
I heard Dustin breathing next to me and smiled. I'd made it through. Dustin had won.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Dream Log
So... I think I've decided to record my dreams. We'll see how long it lasts.
First, Dustin and I have been watching this sci-fi/western called Firefly, which is about a nine-ish person crew on a spaceship. In my dream, I was part of this crew and we were visiting a small town for refueling and such. I was in the gas station picking out a candy bar or something when I noticed a teenage girl sitting at a booth in the corner. She was starting her own business by painting nails, so I went over and asked her how it was going and how long she'd been doing this, yadda, yadda, yadda. We talked for a while and then I ended up giving her a ride home... in my space ship :P There were some right brain, left brain issues like reading her sign in front of the store, trying to place the name of the store (which I know I've seen online somewhere), and other such things you're supposed to be unaware of or unable to do while asleep. She was charging outrageously high prices to do nails and her hours were backwards but other than that the sign wasn't a problem.
On our way to her house we passed a pair from Firefly who were off taking a break and the captian (who wasn't the captian in the show, I actually have no idea who he was or where he came from, all I knew was that in the dream he was my father, even though he was nothing like my father) and I discussed whether or not this pair should date, a point of tension on the show. Out of the blue the girl asked me if I knew why 'he' proposed. I knew she was refering to Dustin, who was no where to be found in the dream. She asked if I had ever asked. I said yes, I had both the long version and the convenient, people want a quick answer version. I told her it was a good question to ask and the answer should be carefully weighed before marriage. I then tried very hard to pull information out of which ever side of the brain is inaccesable in dreams to remember exactly why he had proposed. After several unsuccesful attempts I decided to just wait until I woke up and would remember or, if I didn't, I could ask him.
We dropped her off somewhere and then went to my actual parents current house. Only none of my real family were there. Some other woman on the crew (who also isn't on the show) was trying to seduce the captian and apparently had been for quiet some time. She was married as was the captian but neither of their spouces were anywhere to be found. I, being the captian's daughter, was very irritated by this. The captian walked into the closet for something and the woman sat down on the bed and looked at me in a convincing sort of way. I got the feeling she was trying to make me like her and not care if she slept with my 'father' or not.
"I believe in the sanctity of marriage." she said seriously.
She didn't finish the word marriage before I responded coldly, "I don't want to hear it."
I walked out the bedroom door, shutting it behind me, and up to my old bedroom. I had just reached my door when they started shouting at each other. Apparently, she had slept with him. He kept saying stuff about how he hadn't wanted to and he wouldn't have if she hadn't kept pushing. I was left with the impression that he was very upset that I disapproved.
I didn't care. As in, I didn't care that he was upset. I shut my bedroom door so I couldn't hear them anymore. I was glad he was upset. I wondered if my mother (whoever my mother was in this dream) knew or if she would care. I cleaned my closet until I got the feeling that my 'father' was coming upstairs to talk to me about it. I wondered if I pretended like I was asleep if he would leave me alone. I climbed into bed and woke up.
It was 4 something.
First, Dustin and I have been watching this sci-fi/western called Firefly, which is about a nine-ish person crew on a spaceship. In my dream, I was part of this crew and we were visiting a small town for refueling and such. I was in the gas station picking out a candy bar or something when I noticed a teenage girl sitting at a booth in the corner. She was starting her own business by painting nails, so I went over and asked her how it was going and how long she'd been doing this, yadda, yadda, yadda. We talked for a while and then I ended up giving her a ride home... in my space ship :P There were some right brain, left brain issues like reading her sign in front of the store, trying to place the name of the store (which I know I've seen online somewhere), and other such things you're supposed to be unaware of or unable to do while asleep. She was charging outrageously high prices to do nails and her hours were backwards but other than that the sign wasn't a problem.
On our way to her house we passed a pair from Firefly who were off taking a break and the captian (who wasn't the captian in the show, I actually have no idea who he was or where he came from, all I knew was that in the dream he was my father, even though he was nothing like my father) and I discussed whether or not this pair should date, a point of tension on the show. Out of the blue the girl asked me if I knew why 'he' proposed. I knew she was refering to Dustin, who was no where to be found in the dream. She asked if I had ever asked. I said yes, I had both the long version and the convenient, people want a quick answer version. I told her it was a good question to ask and the answer should be carefully weighed before marriage. I then tried very hard to pull information out of which ever side of the brain is inaccesable in dreams to remember exactly why he had proposed. After several unsuccesful attempts I decided to just wait until I woke up and would remember or, if I didn't, I could ask him.
We dropped her off somewhere and then went to my actual parents current house. Only none of my real family were there. Some other woman on the crew (who also isn't on the show) was trying to seduce the captian and apparently had been for quiet some time. She was married as was the captian but neither of their spouces were anywhere to be found. I, being the captian's daughter, was very irritated by this. The captian walked into the closet for something and the woman sat down on the bed and looked at me in a convincing sort of way. I got the feeling she was trying to make me like her and not care if she slept with my 'father' or not.
"I believe in the sanctity of marriage." she said seriously.
She didn't finish the word marriage before I responded coldly, "I don't want to hear it."
I walked out the bedroom door, shutting it behind me, and up to my old bedroom. I had just reached my door when they started shouting at each other. Apparently, she had slept with him. He kept saying stuff about how he hadn't wanted to and he wouldn't have if she hadn't kept pushing. I was left with the impression that he was very upset that I disapproved.
I didn't care. As in, I didn't care that he was upset. I shut my bedroom door so I couldn't hear them anymore. I was glad he was upset. I wondered if my mother (whoever my mother was in this dream) knew or if she would care. I cleaned my closet until I got the feeling that my 'father' was coming upstairs to talk to me about it. I wondered if I pretended like I was asleep if he would leave me alone. I climbed into bed and woke up.
It was 4 something.
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Saturday, March 15, 2008
I had a good dream last night. In the middle of a bad dream, but I had a good dream none the less. In the midst of basketball teams mourning their murdered team mates and some guy who was stocking me rather overtly but I couldn't find my husband and unfinished business with high-school friends, there was a little bit of... I don't know... resolution.
It was a dream within a dream, because I was in a library in the first dream and I fell asleep while working on my homework. It was linear, which means that I was paying attention to one thing as it unfolded and I was completely unaware of any other story or plot in my other dreams while in this dream. I could hear and sense the memory of music and incense when I first woke up and, and I'm glad I remembered then because I only remember the memory of remembering now. It was sweet and clear. Unlike anything else. There was also only one person other than myself in the dream but I never saw her, I could only hear her voice and see what she wrote, although I still have the vague sense that her actual body was there, I just am not able to remember it. Besides, I was much more captured by what she was writing than what she looked like. She wrote a story, all of which I can't remember, and especially not exactly what she wrote, but it's a story I know well.
My salvation.
She started at the beginning, before the beginning, with the parts we don't know. While reading aloud as she wrote, or did she sing, or was it the same thing. She wrote it all in short understandable sentences. Everything. The what, the why, the how. Every step, every reason. From Adam to Noah to Abraham to Jacob and Issac. To David and, in the end, to Jesus. But she wasn't writing the human side. She was writing God's side. For a brief moment in my whole life, the entire reason for everything there is and everything there will be was written before me in black ink that seeped into the parchment.
But the part that made me remember, the part that made me actually get up to write it down, was the part that I carried with me back into my other dreams, the part she wrote at the end. In regards to my salvation: AFFIRMED. COMPLETED. RESOLVED. SEALED. IT IS FINISHED.
It was not until I woke up that I realized what she had written and in what form it was written in. She wrote it as a law case brief, of which I have had to read quite a few this quarter. They consist of the transgression, the defendant and plaintiffs arguments, the law, the explanation of how the law applies, and a simple statement, usually no more than a word, as to the decision of the court. Usually: affirmed or remanded (if the judgment is overturned from a low court decision). Affirmed. She actually continued writing synonymous words until I awoke from that dream back into my first dream in the library. Affirmed, from the highest court, no chance of remanding. It is finished.
Back in my first dream I looked at a friend and asked her if she ever wished she could read a book in a dream because it might say something other than just the words it shows while we're awake. She gave me a very Kati-ish 'you're out of your mind' look. Which I suppose was appropriate given what I had just said.
But then I realized that everything that had been written, every last word, was written on my forehead. It was written over the top of it's self so the only thing you could read at first glance was the verdict, how the whole verdict fit onto my forehead at the same time baffles me because she wrote a lot, but it did. For anyone with eyes to see. Which apparently wasn't anyone except some guy whom I assume was a demon in human disguise, but that's another story.
This is my story. And I am affirmed.
It is finished.
It was a dream within a dream, because I was in a library in the first dream and I fell asleep while working on my homework. It was linear, which means that I was paying attention to one thing as it unfolded and I was completely unaware of any other story or plot in my other dreams while in this dream. I could hear and sense the memory of music and incense when I first woke up and, and I'm glad I remembered then because I only remember the memory of remembering now. It was sweet and clear. Unlike anything else. There was also only one person other than myself in the dream but I never saw her, I could only hear her voice and see what she wrote, although I still have the vague sense that her actual body was there, I just am not able to remember it. Besides, I was much more captured by what she was writing than what she looked like. She wrote a story, all of which I can't remember, and especially not exactly what she wrote, but it's a story I know well.
My salvation.
She started at the beginning, before the beginning, with the parts we don't know. While reading aloud as she wrote, or did she sing, or was it the same thing. She wrote it all in short understandable sentences. Everything. The what, the why, the how. Every step, every reason. From Adam to Noah to Abraham to Jacob and Issac. To David and, in the end, to Jesus. But she wasn't writing the human side. She was writing God's side. For a brief moment in my whole life, the entire reason for everything there is and everything there will be was written before me in black ink that seeped into the parchment.
But the part that made me remember, the part that made me actually get up to write it down, was the part that I carried with me back into my other dreams, the part she wrote at the end. In regards to my salvation: AFFIRMED. COMPLETED. RESOLVED. SEALED. IT IS FINISHED.
It was not until I woke up that I realized what she had written and in what form it was written in. She wrote it as a law case brief, of which I have had to read quite a few this quarter. They consist of the transgression, the defendant and plaintiffs arguments, the law, the explanation of how the law applies, and a simple statement, usually no more than a word, as to the decision of the court. Usually: affirmed or remanded (if the judgment is overturned from a low court decision). Affirmed. She actually continued writing synonymous words until I awoke from that dream back into my first dream in the library. Affirmed, from the highest court, no chance of remanding. It is finished.
Back in my first dream I looked at a friend and asked her if she ever wished she could read a book in a dream because it might say something other than just the words it shows while we're awake. She gave me a very Kati-ish 'you're out of your mind' look. Which I suppose was appropriate given what I had just said.
But then I realized that everything that had been written, every last word, was written on my forehead. It was written over the top of it's self so the only thing you could read at first glance was the verdict, how the whole verdict fit onto my forehead at the same time baffles me because she wrote a lot, but it did. For anyone with eyes to see. Which apparently wasn't anyone except some guy whom I assume was a demon in human disguise, but that's another story.
This is my story. And I am affirmed.
It is finished.
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